diff --git a/e2e/binary/awk/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/awk/BUILD.bazel
index 148c38e1057a690908b0c7aac3a9def8b918c8cd..862629a7e294de2ba111db750e4302b1259c8201 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/awk/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/awk/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "print",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["print.py"],
     data = [
@@ -23,8 +23,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "awk",
     tests = [
-        ":print",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/b2sum/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/b2sum/BUILD.bazel
index cdec46e7de509d0568f11251b7dc9646fa5be4d5..74a3e1bc65256e6941804836a1d352a8e223514b 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/b2sum/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/b2sum/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "digest",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["digest.py"],
     data = [
@@ -25,8 +25,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "b2sum",
     tests = [
-        ":digest",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/brotli/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/brotli/BUILD.bazel
index ed227b4ecfdf150c28ce1d0a72e1a018da10d86e..9003a0e7e8e893ec8507a7fc5c014a23c5965c6f 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/brotli/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/brotli/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "roundtrip",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["roundtrip.py"],
     data = [
@@ -24,8 +24,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "brotli",
     tests = [
-        ":roundtrip",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/bzip2/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/bzip2/BUILD.bazel
index ebcb3e851a01161339210212c88879873d6d66f1..17550228f2fdbf99493ecb09561cff4f42820212 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/bzip2/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/bzip2/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "roundtrip",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["roundtrip.py"],
     data = [
@@ -24,8 +24,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "bzip2",
     tests = [
-        ":roundtrip",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/cmp/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/cmp/BUILD.bazel
index 5e657eae152c7c7663598831b73f3400dc5cce2d..57c91e2cc73bdb751f43d5293b04cb9e9f3ba17e 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/cmp/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/cmp/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "text",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["text.py"],
     data = [
@@ -26,8 +26,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "cmp",
     tests = [
-        ":text",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/curl/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/curl/BUILD.bazel
index 5bc08c78e581d654f59c06fa25d1a5dc85e8aa75..790098e748f78592d17a56875dbe51db413f5677 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/curl/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/curl/BUILD.bazel
@@ -1,11 +1,31 @@
-load("@bazel_skylib//rules:build_test.bzl", "build_test")
+load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
+load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
-# TODO: write an _actual_ test for `curl`
+py_pytest_test(
+    name = "pytest",
+    size = "small",
+    srcs = ["head.py"],
+    data = [
+        "@ape//ape:curl",
+    ],
+    tags = ["requires-network"],
+    deps = [
+        "//binary:pytest",
+    ],
+)
 
-build_test(
-    name = "curl",
+native_test(
+    name = "version",
     size = "small",
-    tags = ["stub"],
-    targets = ["@ape//ape:curl"],
+    src = "@ape//ape:curl",
+    args = ["--version"],
+)
+
+test_suite(
+    name = "curl",
+    tests = [
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
+    ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/curl/head.py b/e2e/binary/curl/head.py
new file mode 100644
index 0000000000000000000000000000000000000000..6407c5c12d27d302c8e3a750ddc4256cddb87071
--- /dev/null
+++ b/e2e/binary/curl/head.py
@@ -0,0 +1,38 @@
+from __future__ import annotations
+
+from pathlib import Path
+from subprocess import run
+from typing import Final
+from urllib.error import HTTPError
+from urllib.request import Request, urlopen
+
+from binary import Tool
+from pytest import mark
+
+URL: Final = "https://gitlab.arm.com/api/v4/projects"
+
+
+def ping(url: str) -> bool:
+    request = Request(url, method="HEAD")
+
+    # FIXME: remove this when the CI image works with Python SSL verification
+    import ssl
+    context = ssl._create_unverified_context()
+
+    try:
+        with urlopen(request, context=context) as stream:
+            if "Content-Length" not in stream.headers:
+                return False
+            return 200 <= stream.status < 300
+    except HTTPError as e:
+        return False
+
+
+@mark.skipif(not ping(URL), reason="No network availability")
+def test_curl(tool: Tool, tmp_path: Path) -> None:
+    binary = tool("curl")
+
+    cmd = (binary, "-sfSLX", "HEAD", URL)
+    result = run(cmd, timeout=30, capture_output=True, text=True)
+
+    assert 0 == result.returncode, result.stderr
diff --git a/e2e/binary/diff/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/diff/BUILD.bazel
index 45fa9b5cd435f2cffe483b2c9d49902eaca4830c..cb5c70f2ec558b5c0925fc3d16a21f8ec16dc09e 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/diff/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/diff/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "normal",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["normal.py"],
     data = [
@@ -26,8 +26,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "diff",
     tests = [
-        ":normal",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/diff3/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/diff3/BUILD.bazel
index 26e6bf0241232fbab6ebff9d153096e55dadfb1b..69c138962545a0957c5a3ac75bf9fa1e29dbe97d 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/diff3/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/diff3/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "threeway",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["threeway.py"],
     data = [
@@ -28,8 +28,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "diff3",
     tests = [
-        ":threeway",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/gzip/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/gzip/BUILD.bazel
index f5b8e5283ccbd18836205dccef5f06a5303976c4..34fdfc67ee5e93be9c4ea2419c1f87d171c0f58d 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/gzip/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/gzip/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "roundtrip",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["roundtrip.py"],
     data = [
@@ -24,8 +24,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "gzip",
     tests = [
-        ":roundtrip",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/pigz/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/pigz/BUILD.bazel
index f446f6f05f94f5058e3cf684792842b78b892992..c9764e2fb9c8c873702a69e59fa32ce77a8250e3 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/pigz/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/pigz/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "roundtrip",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["roundtrip.py"],
     data = [
@@ -24,8 +24,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "pigz",
     tests = [
-        ":roundtrip",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/sdiff/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/sdiff/BUILD.bazel
index db219d129b94873b3d2fac0efee2f9d37fc4f45e..f8773dd9450ad3f18c4cd1f0a2c9599b9f75aa79 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/sdiff/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/sdiff/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "diff",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["diff.py"],
     data = [
@@ -27,8 +27,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "sdiff",
     tests = [
-        ":diff",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/sha1sum/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/sha1sum/BUILD.bazel
index 9dd80c3ef80b4e9e724d341d02af6d36776f6873..c1aeab72909d3a577ff50c4975381843f7f14620 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/sha1sum/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/sha1sum/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "digest",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["digest.py"],
     data = [
@@ -25,8 +25,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "sha1sum",
     tests = [
-        ":digest",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/sha224sum/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/sha224sum/BUILD.bazel
index ca7557b8e535775c3cdf6574c5b388fe7407e6b1..e88446324843332c2930ba2f109e65eec143869e 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/sha224sum/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/sha224sum/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "digest",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["digest.py"],
     data = [
@@ -25,8 +25,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "sha224sum",
     tests = [
-        ":digest",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/sha256sum/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/sha256sum/BUILD.bazel
index abeff9e667da980acf60f21fc1abfb056bd812d4..b3d856e3b7b51d51de22f9479fc9ea6ebe87aeaa 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/sha256sum/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/sha256sum/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "digest",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["digest.py"],
     data = [
@@ -25,8 +25,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "sha256sum",
     tests = [
-        ":digest",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/sha384sum/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/sha384sum/BUILD.bazel
index c1112fb483dbf1afed1318b8c91ccfaf630ad6b5..43808b92291716d275851fa97c6378f59556c6d6 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/sha384sum/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/sha384sum/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "digest",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["digest.py"],
     data = [
@@ -25,8 +25,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "sha384sum",
     tests = [
-        ":digest",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/sha512sum/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/sha512sum/BUILD.bazel
index 526f7a463571f50bb3beab73342057c06f0bc609..8e740db0e7f3adb59e57cc10ae6e2f8eaadfcbbb 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/sha512sum/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/sha512sum/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "digest",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["digest.py"],
     data = [
@@ -25,8 +25,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "sha512sum",
     tests = [
-        ":digest",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/xz/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/xz/BUILD.bazel
index ef98636ca9f4675cb474ecfd46302e5a1edb9c0e..76065cee38c516a3661fb96094c5ac80a3ed74d0 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/xz/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/xz/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "roundtrip",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["roundtrip.py"],
     data = [
@@ -24,8 +24,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "xz",
     tests = [
-        ":roundtrip",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )
diff --git a/e2e/binary/zstd/BUILD.bazel b/e2e/binary/zstd/BUILD.bazel
index 43a70f523da6d9efae6280f6384311efc3207c41..89842034accf53893932e7a67ede9ade6e35f6ff 100644
--- a/e2e/binary/zstd/BUILD.bazel
+++ b/e2e/binary/zstd/BUILD.bazel
@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@ load("@rules_python_pytest//python_pytest:defs.bzl", "py_pytest_test")
 load("@bazel_skylib//rules:native_binary.bzl", "native_test")
 
 py_pytest_test(
-    name = "roundtrip",
+    name = "pytest",
     size = "small",
     srcs = ["roundtrip.py"],
     data = [
@@ -24,8 +24,8 @@ native_test(
 test_suite(
     name = "zstd",
     tests = [
-        ":roundtrip",
-        ":version",
+        "pytest",
+        "version",
     ],
     visibility = ["//:__subpackages__"],
 )